Burnt to a Crisp

Photo by Nataliya Vaitkevich on Pexels.com

I have been rundown like a dog since the weekend, and I’m not sure why. I know emotionally I’m fried. In between dealing with my stupid & worthless roommate, and then basically the same thing when it comes to my coworker (she spends all day laughing, popping gum, and talking to everyone in a one mile radius.) Frustrated I am, relaxed I am not. I can’t find peace at home, and my job suddenly feels like a chokehold around my neck, when before, I used to enjoy it. I find myself saying, “well hello burnout, we meet again my old friend.”

When I’m not at work; I am at home either cleaning or tending to my duties as part-time student… and I’m right smack dab in the midst of Summer Semester. Which for any current or previous college students; I’m sure you know summer is harder because it’s sooo short so they really pack it in. I also have exercise routines I follow on weekends, bless yoga, it’s an hour I can actually get out of my head. Then I also work in spending time with my family, along with cramming in errands, paying bills, and other miscellaneous tasks. Work is work, your typical 40 hour week, but I often get handed more than usual because the other girl mentioned above can’t tell the difference between a spoon and a fork.

Classic signs of burnout are appearing on me… constant fatigue, irritation, headaches, feeling defeated, loss of motivation, etc… I don’t really feel “hyped” lately, and I have this BIG trip planned for PA next week for my birthday on the 24th, and I barely feel psyched which SUCKS because I was so excited before all this started happening. I don’t want to be on that plane, flying to see my friends, feeling like poo. I won’t be any fun for anyone. Plus it’s going to be my birthday soon, the big 35; I mean come on… burnout now, really??

In previous experiences with burnout I just kind of waited it out till it passed, but I could use some advice. Since the days are literally ticking by… how have you guys dealt with it? Any advice for me?

Published by silversky87

34yrs old, avid reader and aspiring writer. I believe the fire of inspiration can take us to unknown and magical places. I’m a dreamer... Also been through some tough stuff, don’t underestimate me nor bet against me!

2 thoughts on “Burnt to a Crisp

  1. Personally. Im 22 and had a burn out at 20. Now when my body is telling me things. I tend to listen. So if I’m tired. I’ll take a nap.
    If super busy in my mind. I need to clear my schedule a bit. And set bounderies with those around me. And be clear and strict about it.

    Also about your room mate. I don’t know if you tried to talk with them? If not. Explain what happened, what it did for you and your mental health etc. And then bring up different solutions. If you talk from your experience and feelings. Without pointing the finger. Then often people response the best to that.

    And allow your mindset to be like. Life is busy and stressfull atm. so my goal is going to celebrate my birthday and enjoy my trip. See it as a goal which you work towards.

    Those are the things that pop in my head. Sorry if it sounds super direct. Im dutch in general we don’t talk around stuff. But be clear and direct.

    Also you got this!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Believe me when I say, the “talking” route doesn’t work. She will throw up just about any subtle manipulation/sob story/defense mechanism to get herself out of what I present to her. Our latest meeting between her, me, and my aunt resulted in her saying my expectations of her were too high because she’s suffering “oh so badly” Like here’s the list: POTS, possible Fibro diagnosis, allergies, and the equivalent to lung covid? Like what even is that? I rarely even hear her cough or struggle to breathe. My aunt almost died from the Delta strain, so I’m not buying what she’s selling, plus when I see her she’s always fine, and this only seems to be applicable to the house because she’s very high functioning when it comes to her relationship, work, and fun. I see no other option other than eviction, because I feel like I’m being played for a fool.

      Otherwise; I try to set boundaries, but ppl just push past them, and as for me and self-care… its a work in progress.

      I think a big problem right now is I’m possibly in a depressive spell as well, especially after quitting my Abilify. I felt so high and great for awhile and now finally came the crash. I’m hoping it doesn’t spoil the fun next week, but we all know you can’t control depression.

      Like

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