Food for Thought Friday

Say you spent most of your life trying to become this specific version of yourself… and then suddenly the train gets epically derailed. Do you fight to get back on that path? Or take it as a sign to try something new?

My Panic Grows Manic

Yesterday evening I had a mini panic episode in the car on the way home from work. No reason. It just struck with no warning. Anxiety/Panic disorders are a beast. Even with medications. I manage mine with 3, one that I take 2x a day, one at night, and then the other is take as

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Cheated

The more I progress in school the angrier I get. I had such dreams when I was kid. College was always this far away place I would some day go to where parents couldn’t reach and I could finally bloom into the incredible woman I was meant to be. Not the awkward teenager who wore

Closer

Don’t get too close to me… I’m cracked and could fall apart at any moment. Don’t get any closer you, don’t touch me, don’t even dare to look at me. You stay over there. Don’t get too close you, not unless I’m the shattered and your the glue.

High & Low

You’ve got me high You’ve got me low You make me cry You make me laugh You make me angry You make it hard to breathe You make it hard You really rock the boat You are several different faces of me You’ve got me high You’ve got me low Just stop and let me

I said… STOP

I made the choice today to stop taking my Abilify. It’s not because of my fear of TD, which does bother me, but more for the side effects which have been bothering more over the last couple of years of being on it. It’s not easy living the Bipolar life, but even more so when

Superfood

So… I tried kale, and I liked it. Maybe Katy Perry will write a song about this post 🙂 A very close friend of mine had a heart attack recently, and she’s young, like early fifties young. While this wasn’t the motivation behind me eating better, it did give me more of a wake-up call

Five Minutes

I remember the tears freezing to my cheeks, my eyes drying almost instantly from the bitter chill in the air. I could feel the rain turning to ice in my hair, and my hands and feet starting to go numb. I was terrified to fall asleep for fear of my heart losing the rhythm, and

Forms

Bruises bloom Slaps crack Pull me forward Push me back Tears fall Kicks blow The knife cuts Blood flows Abuse is a one letter word But it comes in many forms

Light It Up

Coursing through your blood like fire; I want to light it up. Like veins in the night sky; I want to light it up. I want to be the reflection in your eyes, the reason a tree splits in half, the flash after thunder… I want to be like lightning. Wild and dangerous, but also